I recently said to my lovely husband – ‘you know this might sound funny but I want people to say good things about me after I die.’
There are two kinds of people:
- people who don’t care about what others think of them and
- people who want to be liked.
I belong to the latter group. I always try to do the right thing by people, am way more generous to the world than the world is to me. I don’t expect reciprocation but I do crave acknowledgment. I want to hear that I am making a positive difference to someone in this life. I want to hear someone tell me how I’ve inspired/helped them. I want someone to write nice things about me. How lovely would it be to have someone tell you to your face that you are fantastic!! A poem would be great, an article or blog would be lovely or even a simple verbal message. Sadly, that does not happen to me at all!! Don’t know why …. 😦
It is in this context that I made this statement to my husband. As I grow older, I find that self-introspection and reflection is an every-day occurrence. In one of these moments of reflection I smile at my childishness. I see how silly I am! Does it really matter what people say when I am gone? Am I really going to know after I die. It is hardly going to make a difference to me … so why is it so important to me that nice things should be said after I go??
Kabir Das has written two beautiful dohas on this very topic:
“Kabira Jab Paida Hue to Jag Hansa Hum Roye
Aisi Karni Kar Chalo, Hum Hanse Jag Roye”
When you were born in this world
The world rejoiced and you cried
Live a life so worthy that when you go
You rejoice and the world mourns
“Jab Tun Aaya Jagat Mein, Log Hanse Tu Roye
Aise Karni Na Kari, Pache Hanse Sab Koye”
When you were born in this world Everyone laughed while you cried
Conduct NOT yourself in manner such That they laugh when you are gone
Maybe people’s reactions at your death is a yardstick for the kind of life you’ve lived. Maybe it is not so silly to wish for good things to be said after your death. But I do so wish people would say nice things to me when I am alive too so I can be happy!!
My Ana's Worth 
Reminds me of this poem by Coleridge
“Bid me defend thee!
Thy danger over-human strength shall lend me,
A hand of iron and a heart of steel,
To strike, to wound, to slay, and not to feel.
But if you chide me,
I am a weak, defenceless child beside thee.”
Will discuss about this with you in person 🙂
Sounds good : )
“You Are Fantastic!”
Jorgen, it is 5.30am and your comment is what I’ve woken up to. You have no idea what a nice feeling it is! Thank you …… and thank you for stopping by to read my blog.
Wow, that’s what I was exploring for, what a information! present here at this blog, thanks admin of this web site.
Thank you!
I do not drop a comment, but I looked at
a lot of comments on this page Aisi Karni Kar Chalo …..
| My Ana’s Worth. I do have 2 questions for you if you do not mind. Could it be just me or does it give the impression like a few of the comments look like they are left by brain dead visitors? 😛 And, if you are posting on other sites, I would like to keep up with you. Would you make a list of all of your shared sites like your linkedin profile, Facebook page or twitter feed?
I really don’t understand your comment, especially your first question. Please help!! Are you saying I am brain dead? 🙂
Thanks for the marvelous posting! I seriously enjoyed
reading it, you could be a great author. I will make sure to bookmark your blog and will eventually come back in the foreseeable future.
I want to encourage yourself to continue your great work, have
a nice evening!
Thank you so much! I haven’t written in ages! I write because it makes me happy but it feels good when someone enjoys it too!